Blame doesn't work. Blame keeps you stuck in your problems. Blame makes our parents monsters capable of creating our lives in a way that we can't. Does that sound like power? It's not.
The key to dealing with how you were raised is not in pretending that your childhood was rosy and pink if it wasn't. The power of your childhood comes in looking at it and saying to yourself, "I was raised by people who did the best they could with what they had and they were raised by people who did the best they could with what they had and I don't have to live up to my parents expectations for me. I CAN go beyond them!"
That's the truth: You CAN go beyond your parents' expectations (limitations).
You can transform your life in ways they couldn't have ever imagined. In the same way that people who lived in the 1800s couldn't imagine a time when there would be cell phones, laptops and MP3 players, our parents are people who live in a certain space and time. They have their own limiting beliefs to deal with. Their limiting beliefs don't have to become yours UNLESS you choose it...
At the end of the day, you are not your parents. What they taught you can be unlearned. At any moment, you can clean out your mental house and let all that old programming go. Why do so many refuse to do it? Truth be told, they'd rather be stuck and play victim. Blame has its own rewards when you're doing it. By the time people realize that blame offers no long term benefits, years have passed.
Get the lesson now: you are NOT your parents.